Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize