I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
