Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
