Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
