After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
