talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
