She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
