i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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