I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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