Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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