Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize