a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
