she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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