Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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