Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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