They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
