I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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