and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
