i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
