There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
