oh god the rape fog is back!
He passed out mid-signature
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize