I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
