I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
