i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
