I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
