Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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