I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
