Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
