Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
We're too hungover to prance.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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