I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
