You're my little dorito
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
