Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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