dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
