Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Randomize
