its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Randomize
