hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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