Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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