why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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