Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Randomize
