no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
