apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Randomize
