Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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