batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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