There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize