This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Someone came in the potted fern
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
