his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
