I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
