I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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