how can u be prego again
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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