would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
